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[Hello, Vertiline.

Look at your mate, now back to Zevran. Now back to your mate. Now back to Zevran. Sadly, they aren't Zevran. But if they stopped smashing statues and came to hang out in the temple baths, they could smell like they were Zevran.

Look down. Back up. Where are you? You're in the temple baths with the elf your mate could smell like. What's in your hand? Back to Zevran -- it's your clothes, because who takes a bath with their clothes on?

Look again! Your clothes are now a towel and/or bath products. Anything you like, because you're facing a man who smells like an elf and not a dwarf.

... He's in the baths.]

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[Her line of sight ticks from the troll to the elf, back and forth as if it can't decide who to fix on. Eventually Lilith rolls it at the ceiling, waving her hand dismissively.]

Bashful's not the word I was thinking of. If you boys are having a good time by yourselves, I can leave.

[Even as she says that, the Siren is strolling alongside the walls, taking in her surroundings.]

[Kevas shoots Zevran a look over his shoulder. You hump his leg enough as it is. He doesn't want to give more reasons to keep doing it.]

Why would we be wantin' jah to leave? I fuh one be happy to have such a remarkable ladymon here.

[It gives him something much more pleasant to focus on.]

[Zevran just grins, pulling his arms out of the water to drape them over the back of the pool. He looks completely unrepentant.]

There is no 'good time' that cannot be improved by a third party... Three is a most delightful crowd, as we say in my homeland.

[Lilith is filthy-minded. The double entendre is not lost on her.

Her mouth puckers a little from the effort of not smirking before she gives up and flashes her pearly whites in a sharky grin. Even so, the cogwheels in her brain are turning.]

Sounds like your homeland is where it's at. Do I know you two?

Believe we spoke on da radio. I could nevah fuhget such a lovely voice.

[Even if she was shrieking at the time.]

My name be Kevas. It be a pleasuh to meet joo.

[Kevas removes his hat and bows. Apparently he forgot that a certain someone is in the bath behind him.]

Mm, yes. I believe you do. You would not believe my most sincere of compliments, if I recall.

[He gives her another broad smile, before his attention is completely distracted. He tilts his head to one side, regarding the troll's backside... thoughtfully.]

And here, I had thought you were not interested in the waving of sticks, my large friend... what am I to think when you continue to send me such... temptingly mixed signals?

Oh wow.

[She blasts an unladylike snort, caressing the hilt of the jagged knife lifted from the armory. On the opposite thigh is a hoslter for an old-timer machine pistol. Not stuff you usually bathe with.]

Real chivalrous but you might want to be careful who you flash your glory hole to.

Just sayin'.

[Lilith smiles sweetly.]

Edited 2011-02-12 07:10 (UTC)

[Kevas rises but his smile doesn't fade. Sure he'll kill Zevran later but right now he's got other things on his mind.]

I'll charge him fuh it latah, but a dazzlin' ladymon like joo I'd happily give a free show.

[He chuckles. What does he care what's ladylike or not? Her weapons, however, don't go unnoticed. Maybe he should consider carrying a smaller blade... somewhere.]

I am certain we can work some sort of agreement out, my large friend.

[Another grin, in Lilith's direction.]

[Naked green-skinned male swinging his bits around for the world to see? Check. Flirtatious blond elf in a tub? Check.

If this weren't a nightmare situation (her being virtually nerfed to hell and back), Lilith might think she was stuck in a drug-induced hallucination. Or maybe a wet dream.

After eyeballing Kevas's dangling appendage she raises a hand, stretching it out in front of her to shield that section of him from her view.]

There are ways to charm a girl, buddy, and offering to flash her your asshole isn't one of 'em. Besides, I don't even know if I'm into aliens.

[Or elves... but she's more inclined to think that Zevran is under the effects of body mods.]

[This one is determined to take everything he says the wrong way isn't she? That's not going to stop him however.]

Den it be a good t'ing dat I be a troll.

[He doesn't even know what an alien is, though if they look anything like trolls he wouldn't mind meeting a few.]

And an even better thing that I am an elf, yes?

[Like Kevas, he has no idea what an alien is. But, if it looks like the big guy... maybe they aren't so bad.]

You prefer a more direct form of charming flattery, if I remember correctly.

[He stretches a little, clearly showing off.]

Well? Do I... meet with your exacting expectations?

[Troll, Lilith is trolling you.

Unable to resist temptation in any form, she cracks her fingers apart to peek-- and then Zevran in his shining glory catches her eye.]

Eh. I'm not sure. [Pretending to be thinking very, very seriously, she folds her arms across her chest and regards them both. Anyone who's familiar with her knows to be wary of the cruel glint to her smile.]

You're kinda on the small and fragile side, elfie boy. Hands are pretty, though, know how to use 'em?

[Kevas smirks but he's not about to turn around to see Zevran in his birthday suit.]

All elves be fragile. Joo gotta be careful when jah play wid dem. Nevah really liked holdin' back myself.

[Of course that never kept him from having his share of elves before.]

[He just grins, his usual, charming, I-Am-So-Awesome, grin.]

I suppose 'small' could be one word to describe my otherwise fantastic physique. However, I believe such a comparison relies on if one desires quantity...

[And he shoots Kevas a long, knowing look.]

... rather than quality. Of the hands, of the waving of sticks, the using of chains and leathers...

[He shrugs -- yes, he knows he's short, but he's determined to not let it faze him. He's perfectly fine where it counts, after all.]

After all, I find that holding back always ends up leaving someone wanting. And that is ever so disappointing, yes?

[Lilith is a confident woman who has no patience for insecurities. People might be on the same level as serfs to her, but she can appreciate the ones who rise to a challenge. Giggling and extremely entertained by their high opinions of themselves, she flicks her hair back and deliberately shows her teeth.]

Yanno what I think? I think you guys are perfect for each other.

[Kevas shoots a look right back a Zevran.]

Good t'ing dat I can give both no mattah da pace.

[This troll is a gentleman in and out of bed. He won't leave his ladymons disappointed. In fact he likes to leave them wanting more. Kevas loves having repeat customers.

Looking at Lilith he can't help but be reminded of an animal bearing its fangs. He likes it.]

I t'ink we be a party.

Who was speaking of pace?

[He tilts his head, his grin turning challenging. It wouldn't be the first time he engaged in such banter, nor will it be the last.

He trails a hand through the water, idly watching the ripples, and pretending to be incredibly interested in it.]

So I continue to tell him... unfortunately, he does not seem to agree... ah. Such a shame.

[His eyes flick up, glancing from woman to troll.]

However... I am not adverse to parties in the slightest.

[There is no such thing as getting in over her head.

She drawls:] Parties are usually the bomb, but boys, I am so sorry. Today... just not in the zone.

[Lilith waits a beat and then titters.]

I could watch!

Dat be a damn shame. I always be up fuh party. Maybe latah den, hopefully joo'll remembuh us, or at least me.

[And now Kevas finds himself in the exact same situation from when he first met Zevran. Just how does this keep happening to him?]

Sorry ladymon but I ain't be drunk 'nuff fuh dat.

[In fact he's quite sure that the amount of alcohol it would take to get him willing for that would kill him.]

Are you certain we cannot assist you in finding your zone?

[He smiles a lazy, self-assured smile at them both.]

Or perhaps watching would do the same thing. I have no objections to an audience.

[Lilith mulls over her options. For the first time, her eyes wander toward the troll's face (having been justifiably sidetracked by soaking wet glistening bronzed manflesh and never-before-seen alien jubbly bits). A nose that long would be hideous on a human, and while Kevas is certainly not handsome by HER definition, it takes more than generic Hollywood physique to inspire interest.

And here on the other hand is Zevran, entirely unlike the commercially spammed caricatures of elves she's used to. Santa's jolly helpers don't have facial tattoos, filthy mouths, or bedroom eyes, for that matter. She can't be blamed for curiosity on two ends of the deal.]

Take a rain check and call me, baby. [Lilith makes an exaggerated show of sighing and fanning herself.] Hot in here, or what? I got bunches of explorin' to do, so I'm gonna step on outside and... leave you to it.

[Her exit would be dramatic perfection... if she could phase. She settles for a roguish dimply wink and a happy hop-step out of the temple.]

[Kevas whistles and doesn't even bother hiding the fact that he's checking out her backside as she leaves. That one is going to be fun. He can just tell.

The troll throws a look over to Zevran and grins.]

She be takin' da bait. Now just to reel da ladymon in.

[After all that Kevas thinks that he'll be using one of the private baths. Last thing he wants right now is an excited elf rubbing all over him. Which reminds him...]

Joo fuhget whatchu seen here alright?

[You know what he means.]

As you wish.

[He goes so far as to blow her a kiss as she departs, still grinning in an appropriately wicked manner.]

Ah, wonderful! It has been ever so long since I was able to play a... what is the term... wing man...? Truly, it is a delight.

[And then he pouts. Zevran can pout on command.]

But why would I want to commit such a heinous crime against such a pretty part of yourself?

[Kevas sighs and keeps walking towards the private baths.]

Den at least don't go sharin' whatchu saw.

[He would like to keep what little reputation he has in this place intact.]

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so would we all, zevran, so would we all

take a number

Sad day.

is Zevran going to hide knives in his anal cavity? crack addicts do that.

well he could certainly fit them in there

... maybe if they were in a protective sheath :|

is that what the kids call them these days...

the things you kids call your toys

You know it B)

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